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Love and Laughter Collide: Unforgettable Moments When People Discovered They Were Dating an Idiot


"Some time back, I penned a post where members of the BuzzFeed Community spilled the beans on the most ludicrous things their ex-partners had uttered. The response was overwhelming, with even more people chiming in with their own tales in the comments. Brace yourselves for a laughter-inducing journey as we delve into some of the most side-splitting and downright absurd moments from people's past relationships:

• "Picture this: a Mexican restaurant, a side salad, and my boyfriend asking why I got 'fajita ingredients' without ordering a fajita."

• "During my pregnancy, my husband dropped this gem: he believed babies don't wear diapers when they sleep. His solution? Imagining they wore some mystical sleep gown. Enter the confusion about sleep sacks."

• "Whole milk aficionado alert! My ex's reasoning? When confronted with 2% milk, he pondered, 'What's the other 98%?' Genius level: unknown."

• "Dating a guy who claimed, 'Leonardo DiCaprio, talk about a one-hit wonder!' I'm still trying to decode that one."

• "Thanksgiving confusion: my boyfriend asked, 'What day of the week is Thanksgiving this year?' Apparently, days of the week pose a challenge in America where Thanksgiving is eternally on a Thursday."

• "Egg hatching beliefs: my 40-something ex thought eggs left on the counter would magically hatch. Spoiler alert: they don't."

• "Vocabulary woes: my ex was clueless about 'famine' and assumed it was an east London slang. RIP to that relationship."

• "Mickey Mouse mysteries: my ex inquired, 'What kind of animal is Mickey Mouse?' Slow claps for that one."

• "Les Misunderstanding: When asked about my favorite musical, I mentioned Les Mis. His response? 'What's the French Revolution?' Cue facepalm."

• "Pizza math: 'How many halves in a whole?' My ex-cook asked this profound question about calories in a half pizza."

• "ATM education: My ex-husband believed withdrawing money from an ATM required no checking account or card. Bonus: he pronounced 'ATM' as 'Adam.'"

These nuggets of wisdom remind us that sometimes, love comes with a side of hilarity and head-scratching moments."

• "In the realm of unique beliefs, my ex took the cake. He genuinely believed that the length of a man's intimate anatomy was determined by how the doctor cut the umbilical cord. Yes, you heard that right. He blamed the doctors for his theory of 'cutting it too short,' completely unaware that the umbilical cord has nothing to do with one's nether regions. Bonus ignorance: he assumed girls didn't have an umbilical cord to cut at birth."

• "Enter the 'anti-water' crusader. My best friend's ex-boyfriend was convinced that water was a harbinger of health problems, including cancer. His solution? An all-day, everyday diet of soda and diet soda. Because apparently, that's the epitome of health."

• "The quest for knowledge took an interesting turn when they questioned the fat content in water. Spoiler alert: it's a resounding zero."

• "Coffee cup chronicles: My ex had a peculiar method of reheating coffee, involving electric stovetops and, unfortunately, broken coffee cups. Despite the presence of a perfectly functional microwave, she persisted. A master's degree couldn't save those poor cups. The solution? A plug-in coffee cup warmer."

• "Easter escapade: My date for Easter dinner once asked, 'What day of the week is Easter this year?' My mom's shock was palpable, and our relationship didn't survive the aftermath."

• "Fajita fiasco: One adventurous soul ordered questionable fajitas from Chili's, suffered food poisoning, and then, against all odds, indulged in the leftovers. Survival of the fittest, or just questionable decision-making?"

• "Historical misconceptions: Imagine a world where Adam and Eve were historical figures, but dinosaurs were mere myths. Throw in a dash of self-diagnosed sperm allergy for that extra twist."

• "Chemical confusion: She believed rust belonged to the periodic table, nestled between oxygen and neon. Move over, uranium; rust is the new element in town."

• "Mall map mystery: High school romance took a confusing turn when my intelligent girlfriend asked how the mall map knew where we were standing. The 'You are here' star sparked a 10-minute debate on map intelligence."

• "Medical misunderstanding: Accusations of infidelity arose when I mentioned a UTI, with my ex assuming it was an STI. Cue a 20-minute crash course on urinary tract infections and their non-discriminatory nature."

• "Embarking on a trip to Los Cabos in Mexico with my ex-husband, the surreal moment struck when he asked if I knew how to speak 'Mexican' alongside Spanish. Picture this: a brilliant mind, a hedge fund runner with an MBA from a top business school genuinely believing that 'Mexican' was a language spoken in Mexico. I stood there, MBA and all, utterly dumbfounded."

• "Enter the zoological debate: I once dated someone who vehemently rejected the idea that humans are animals. 'We're people, not animals!' she insisted, grappling with the concept that we could belong to more than one category. Zoology classes might have been a game-changer."

• "Humility hurdle: Advising a date to embrace humility took an unexpected turn when he responded with, 'Why would I want to be humiliated?' A lesson in vocabulary ensued."

• "Time-traveling confusion: In the heyday of Harry Potter movies, I found myself in a bookstore with a companion who dropped this gem: 'The Harry Potter movies are so successful that they made books.' A quick reality check was in order, explaining the magical world of literature that preceded the cinematic enchantment."

"In the grand tapestry of relationships, these anecdotes serve as a reminder that love and laughter often share the stage. From misconceptions about anatomy to linguistic confusions, each tale unveils the quirks that make us human. Whether it's the belief in 'Mexican' as a language, the refusal to acknowledge our animalistic roots, or the perplexity of humility, these stories showcase the spectrum of human experiences. As we navigate the twists and turns of romance, let's not forget that behind every eye-roll-inducing moment is a shared laughter that transcends the idiosyncrasies of love. After all, in the comedy of life, we're all just trying to speak the language of understanding, even if it's not 'Mexican.'"